Here Goes Nothing!

Hey there! I can’t believe it’s been over 2 years since I wrote anything. It’s been a busy two years! Most of you have followed my journey through Tennessee from Knoxville to Chattanooga, then Nashville and now Memphis. I think I’ll be here a while. Something about being near family but also in a place where I didn’t grow up seems to allow me to be myself while being supported by those I love. It feels right for now. But who knows - I think I said the same about Nashville.

So I did this thing that I was really uncomfortable with. Not uncomfortable enough to know better but once I started and then it was headed out to the public the vulnerability hangover set in. I recorded a podcast with some women from Chattanooga who I admire. It was so exciting to be asked but once it was over my old brain took over and started the old messages of “why did you share that?” “People will think you are a brat for saying that?” “What if someone disagrees or I got something wrong?” Even “Who am I to pretend to know what I'm talking about?"

The nice thing about teaching shame resilience to people is that you have to get pretty good at it yourself. So I sucked it up and applied the four steps of shame resilience and it is helping.

First I noticed the desire to hide and stay small and the negative chatter that comes along with shame in my head. Then I practiced a little critical thinking. Mostly I thought about all the podcasts out there and the fact that even my favorite podcasters get negative feedback at times. Then I shared - and my cheerleaders (Kat, Jennifer, Wynn, Greg and Ashley) showed up and said "how exciting!" Now I'm sharing with you because "speaking shame" sometimes means we do the thing and own it.

It was so fun to chat with other professionals and share all the learning I've gained from my work with clients over the last 10 years. I have met some beautiful souls and been lucky enough to see them grow and bloom and embrace their authenticity. Sharing seems like a great way to honor the hard work they did. Walk the walk they say.

If you want to take a listen here is the link. https://open.spotify.com/episode/1J0TxFJGXjYNIUKOsLXMG8?si=XR62UxErTNajxI0VhKxOOw.

Please take a listen to the other episodes as well. Christy and Kat are doing a great job of sharing the wisdom of both yoga and the Enneagram.

I See Color

I See Color

I SEE COLOR! And I think it is very important to recognize that one's skin color, sexual orientation, gender, and many other things affect our perspective. That means we all have different perspectives. Perspective taking is key to being able to offer empathy, acceptance and forgiveness. If we ignore color then we cannot engage in common humanity which pushes us into victim thinking and defense mode. Without common humanity we also lose our own self compassion. Compassion for others leads to compassion for self. Compassion for anger as well as pain.

Ponderings From My Week In The Closet

Ponderings From My Week In The Closet

There are lots of critics out there. We must make decisions based on our own value system and needs. I found myself judging others based on their decisions but then was able to take perspective and recognize that their reasoning was not without rationale and was simply different than mine. I also noticed that it took me some time to stop listening to others and listen to my own intuition. Perfection is an unattainable goal.

Hello Anxiety, I Wondered When You Would Get Here

Hello Anxiety, I Wondered When You Would Get Here

Since noticing my racing mind I have been reminded of all the skills that I personally use to manage anxiety in stressful times. I was also reminded that there is no way to get your life “perfect” and avoid stress. As much as I would like to believe that I can manufacture my life to avoid anxiety, I know I cannot. And once again, I am reminded that I can only control me and I can’t control the weather, a virus or other people, just me. What I can do is notice my emotions (avoiding denial), honor them (Hello anxiety, thanks for reminding me to be careful.), and let them pass (they always do.) I can also spend time enjoying the breaks between and recovering and restoring my emotional energy.

One Glorious Breath

One Glorious Breath

I took a breath. Not any breath It was a huge breath…and then I forgot about it. Today I remembered. I recalled the depth and beauty of it. I remember the feeling of peace that came after, as if all was right with the world. It came back to me in a rush, the safety of it, the awe of how much space I could find in my body and the total relaxation that I felt letting it out.

My Healing Spot

My Healing Spot

Being able to take a day trip or weekend up to the mountains and listen to the river, smell the mountain air, cook in my grandmothers kitchen and care take this special place I love has been a great part of my healing.

Guidepost #7 Cultivating Play and Rest

Guidepost #7 Cultivating Play and Rest

Changing old habits is not an easy task as I have learned over the past year. It is not just a place and the people around you that affect your ability to cultivate play and rest but you can easily become conditioned to think play and rest are a waste of time. In fact, today’s culture does not encourage it. Sports have become hard work and expectations are high. Jobs have increased duties and after work responsibilities are overwhelming for many.

Guidepost #6 Cultivating Creativity....

Guidepost #6 Cultivating Creativity....

Creativity is everywhere. It is creating a birthday party for your cat, solving a complex problem, writing, dancing, singing, cooking and painting. It is not good or bad, right or wrong, better or worse or valuable or worthless. It is an expression of you that if left trapped inside will prevent your heart from opening and sharing your true self with the world

Guidepost #5 Cultivating Intuition and trusting Faith

Guidepost #5 Cultivating Intuition and trusting Faith

So I have to stop the struggle?!  ARRGH, yes I do. This doesn’t mean giving up or quitting, but letting go and trusting that that I have made the best decisions and choices with the information I have and having faith in my own abilities to manage whatever comes my way, and in the universe to give me what I need.

Riding The Waves Of Grief

Riding The Waves Of Grief

For me this has been a week of loss and watching others experience loss. I wish I had the power to take away the pain, but I know the best I can do is offer a lifeline as they ride the wave and help them grab a life giving breath or two and I can support those who support them with practical help so that they can sit and hold space for them.